1009
- 25 Jan 2006 (2 years ago)
Cheiftan o the puddin race
- by shedir
Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie Just as ye sit doon, among yer kin There sterts to stir an enormous wind
The neeps and tatties and mushy peas Stert working like a gentle breeze But soon the puddin, wi the sauncie face Will have ye blawin all ower the place
Nae matter whit the hell ye dae Abodys gonnae hae tae pay Even if ye try to stifle Its like a bullet oot a rifle
Hawd yer bum tight tae the chair Tae try and stop the leakin air Shify yersel fae cheek tae cheek Prae tae God it doesnae reek
But aw yer efforts go asunder Oot it comes like a clap o thunder ! Ricochets aroon the room Michty me ! A sonic boom !
Good God Almighty, it fairly reeks Hope I huvnae shit ma breeks Tae the bog, I better scurry Ach whit the hell, its no my worry
Abody roon aboot me choking Wan or two are nearly boakin Ill feel better in a while A cannae help but raise a smile
Alas too late, hes just keeled ower Ye durty bugger ! they shout and stare A dinnae feel welcome any mair
Where ere ye go let yer wind gang free Sounds just like the job fur me Whit a fuss at Rabbies perty Ower the sake o wan wee ferty !
Anânoo a shame in aw ma troosers, the truth becomes tae peal too true; when I let go that reekin bampot - fuckâs sake, it seems I fallawed thru....