Antisocial sports fans [muz]

In an attempt to further procrastinate in the face of my impending exams, I've been perusing BBC News for anything of interest.

One thing that caught my eye was the fact that today alone there have been not one, not two, not three, but FOUR stories regarding measures being taken against fans considered to be 'hooligans'. More specifically, these are English football fans. Barring one incident in Turkey, I am hard pressed to think of any other incident of football related violence on the part of another nation's fans.

Even more interesting, perhaps, is the fact that this phenomenon appears only to occur in relation to football. A search for 'rugby hooligans' returned two results from BBC News; 'cricket hooligans' but one. Comparatively, there were two hundred and sixty seven stories returned for a search on 'football hooligans'.

Now, while I'm sure the majority of EED would most likely use said evidence as yet more corroboration of the self-evident truth that football sucks piss, I find myself curious as to what the football fans that read this collective stream-of-consciousness site think. (Stop laughing, there must be some.)

I honestly can think of no logial explanation. While the lack of violence at cricket matches is perhaps unsurprising, rugby is ostensibly a much more violent sport than football, and yet there is almost no violence associated with the support of one's team. Indeed, at the Army Navy game this year, where you might think the fans would be more prone towards violence than normal, I observed no malicious intent, only good-spirited camaraderie and an enjoyment of the game. Perhaps this is the ultimate proof of the old adage:



'Football is a gentlemen's game played by thugs, while rugby is a thugs' game played by gentlemen.'

Die, Royal Mail, Die! [beej]

This is part rant, part concern about the state of Royal Mail. We all know its fucked right? Proof as ever when I ordered a new 200GB Barracuda for 97GBP from Komplett (cheaper than Dabs, w00t!)
After it showed on the Komplett site as 'shipped, your Parcel Force UID is 123456789' I attempted to track it at parcelforce.com. What did I learn?
Well after they'd had it for 24-48hrs, all the tracker said was 'Service: Parcelforce 24'. Not a lot of use really is it. Is the package in a depot? No idea. In a truck? No idea. In London? No idea. On planet earth even...?
So given how straightforward e-commerce should be, I sent Parcel Force a missive asking where the fuck my parcel was, and with some constructive criticism suggesting that their end-to-end business probably allows for 100% tracking of every single package which they are paid to deliver. Like, for example, UPS and their little handhelds. Like Business Post. Like everyone else.
Their first e-mail back to me this morning authoritatively said that it will be delivered today. This is amusing, as I picked it up from the depot on Saturday (tee hee).
Then, a second e-mail (silver star for effort) that includes the following pearls of wisom:

'Your parcel has been posted using an untraceable service'

'Please allow up to 1 month for your parcel to arrive'

Untraceable service? What is that? Allow up to one month? Comedy! You take a parcel and you deliver it you fucking muppets! Just push the status from your internal computer system onto a website! You're monkeymen! With red vans! Now get on with it!
We've had a postal service in Britain for nearly 400 years... how hard can it be?

RDC and teh future [slim]

These days it's just not worth using your computer at work for anything personal, especially email. Chances are if you're caught doing something in the name of your employer, you're going to get binned. Even using an external webmail client is a bit iffy, as they can be logged, cached and the content of the text you chuck back and forward can, if not properly encrypted, trigger alerts at your companies firewall. At the very least it'll log stacks of hits for you to the address of your webmail server, or the server will be in the block list and you can't get near it..
So instead I enabled RDC on my computer at home, it's a windows 2000 server so will let you have a local connection as well as a single remote one via rdc. Windows XP allows you to do rdc too, but it's only one user at a time in total. Anyway, that works a treat, I get a single open connection to my home pc, encrypted and low bandwidth, that has everything I need to survive the day. I initially used it mostly for email, but nowadays I have a bunch of apps and shortcuts and whatnot open on it. It's actually dead handy for work too, as I can do tests too and from the work connection from a machine outside, so I've even got some feeble justification for it all.
But what I've found lately is that I'm using the RDC connection more than I'm using the local connection. I leave work, and close my rdc session leaving all the apps running. When I get home I just connect to this session from whichever computer I'm using, and everythings there waiting for me. My laptops fairly stinky, but that doesn't matter, because all its doing is rendering the screen, the works taking place on the server. This even makes the laptop run for longer, as it's not using its hdd at all and I can power the cpu down to fek all. What's more amazing is the features available now on rdc, I can map the printer from work and print stuff to my home printer, I can map the sound card and listen to stuff, I can even map local disks on the host pc, it's pretty amazing stuff really.
Wouldn't it be ace if this developed into a more widely used standard. In teh future we could all have rdc machines at home, they might even not have keyboards and mice or screens attached to em at all, they just sit there waiting for wireless rdc connections from wherever. Telephone booths and libraries and whatever have rdc clients where you just dial this box, do your computing, and disconnect. All your stuff wherever you are, that'd rock right?
One of my first tasks as IT Manager for a company a decade ago was to rip out the nasty green screened wyse terminals that connected to a single Unix computer and replace it with sexy desktop pc's that ran with glorious colour monitors. What a forward thinking company we were...

Adults no longer allowed to see hard willies shocker [slim]

Just as people started flocking to subscribe to view the new genuinely hardcore material, it's been pulled. The Adult Channel and Playboy TV are back to regular boring old softcore. There's outrage naturally, people put up with it before, but now they've had a taste for what could be on our Tellys and had it turn from under our salivating chins, its made the fustration even worse.
A post on digitalspy forums claiming to be a reply from a 'why oh fucking why' post to offcom goes like this:
Thank you for contacting us about this subject. I doubt that anything I say will alter your opinion that 'hardcore' material should be allowed on Ofcom licensed adult services. But I hope that I can at least demonstrate that our policy is a considered one that seeks to balance the various interests.
Adult services have been allowed on cable and satellite services for a decade now. They include programming more explicit than would be allowed on free-to-air or basic package channels. Much of the programming is cut down hardcore. Our research indicates, however, that public opinion does not favour a move to wholly explicit programming of the sort now available in 'R18'-rated videos. These videos are available only in licensed sex shops, and the broadcasters have to respect the law on this matter.
So a balance is struck between the legitimate wishes of adults to see sex programming and concerns over child protection. Broadcasting is not obviously suited to providing material otherwise available only in a hundred or so specialist shops where access by children can be easily policed. Even where encryption and other security measures can be applied, the wide distribution of the most explicit material must be a significant issue.
Their justification, child protection. Why would any children be watching hardcor content shown on a subscription only, password protected encrypted channel broadcasting after midnight?
Meanwhile of course, you can see people getting their heads blown off on any channel at any time after 10pm.
Fucking hate this country sometimes..

The hardest haircut in the world.... [houmous]

Di had to do the hardest haircut she had ever had to do yesterday. It wasnÂ’t technically demanding and she had done it loads of times before. The trouble was that she was doing it for the last time for Lisa, a 45 year old and mother of 2 kids who has been here many times for a hairdo.
A month or so ago Lisa had gone to the doctors not feeling well.He initially said she had an acid stomach but after tests she was found to have cancer of the lymph gland and sent home with what was, by yesterday, another two weeks to live. What the hell do you say to someone in those situations? Sitting in my lair I was amazed at LisaÂ’s laughter from the salon (for those of you that donÂ’t know Di works from home), especially when Di suggested 'well how about going blonde then'.
I decided I wanted to go in to say something before I had to go out even though I only knew her to say hello – but what the hell go you say – I got as far as 'Hi' before I faltered…She looked at me beaming – Its OK Robin you don’t have to say anything she says...'Good luck Lisa' I replied before leaving. I did have to go out but I was pretty glad I didn’t have to be there when she left and Di was pretty upset when I got back.
Three months ago I went to a funeral for Martin, 44, who I had worked with for many years. About 18 months previously he had found he had got a bone cancer and after fighting it for all that time (marrow transplants, chemo etc) his kidneys finally went and he knew it was over. Friend after friend took turns at the front of the church to say how they had had a call from Martin in that final week which started 'IÂ’m sorry to bother you mate but IÂ’m going to pop my clogs by Saturday so I just wanted to ring and say goodbye'.
Without detracting from the immense bravery of these two people I could go on. A friendÂ’s wife who died in childbirth, other people I know who found out of the blue they only had a short while to live...
This brings me to my point. All these people were over 40. I’m not saying that life ends after 40, far from it – in many ways for me it began about then, but what I saying is that the nasty man throwing wet sponges at you gets a damn sight more accurate after 40.
So...what I am saying to all you sub 40 people is this. If you have a goal, if there is something you want to do, then do it. Now. Want to learn French? Play the piano? Move to Australia? Change that work/life balance? Have a tattoo done? Begin a relationship or end one? Then do it.
Yes I know they are superficial at a certain level but they won’t be to you – and you won’t forget them – (and at the end all there is is what we remember). Because the worst feeling in the world must be to find yourself on your deathbed with that sinking feeling – like when you suddenly realize you have forgotten to go to the shops to get something you really need and they shut in 5 minutes and it’s too late.
Obviously feel free to respond to this blog however you like but IÂ’d far rather see examples of what we are going to do than other examples of people keeling over. Then maybe LisaÂ’s and MartinÂ’s stories might be just a tiny bit less pointless and futile.

Uses for a switched off mobile phone [slim]

My wife has a mobile. It's her third mobile in fact, she destroyed the first two by smashing them in half, this one has lasted over a year because it's one of those tough rubberized indestructable jobbies. Her destruction of phones in the early days was fustrating, but the longevity of this phone is also pissing me off. Why? Because even though the phone has survived this year in her pocket, it's never fucking switched on. She picks it up every time she goes out, but leaves the fucker off. Now the rational explanation is that she only wants to make, not recieve calls. I'm not fucking interested in rational frankly. I want to know why we pay a contract and why she carries the thing around constanly in its offline state.
In short, what use is a turned off mobile phone to a woman? Answers please...

Review: The Day After Tomorrow [brit]

The new Roland Emmerich (Mr. Independence Day) film, 'The Day After Tomorrow' broke last week and I snuck down to the local flicks to grab a slice of it. It was exactly as expected - a SFX-fest surrounding a fairly typical and lacklustre plot.
The SFX are as you'd expect mind blowingly good. I'm sure you've seen the trailer by now; the huge waves deluging Manhatten, and 'twisters' ripping six kinds of crap out of Los Angeles. In short, it's the SFX that makes this film watchable and as such, delivers on it's promises.
Being an Emmerich film, we're noticably light on any real substance since he's quite famous for the big screen effects led blockbuster; not one of which digs too deeply into any individual character because really, the film isn't there for that. Given the film's subject, it could have been a far more powerful commentary on the ongoing and very real issues we face insofar as environmental protection is concerned; yet really, the film's eco-message is simply an excuse to drown New York.
We have heros, we have misguided fools, we have danger and we have excitement - it's a textbook blockbuster title. It even manages to do what most blockbusters do, and effectively run out of steam as far as the plot is concerned about 3/4 of the way through; it's an almost tangible sensation... 'this is where they got tired/got bored/ran out of budget/etc'. Which is a shame, because up until that point, it's a right rollicking movie.
TDAT does exactly what it says on the tin, and is well worth the ticket price; if only because unlike other SFX led movies of late, it's scarily realistic and there's just something delicious about watching Lower Manhatten vanish under billions of tonnes of icy water :)