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Friday, 6 December 2002

One For Beej [muz]



As you may or may not have heard, I've recently joined Birmingham University Royal Naval Unit. Every Thursday I attend 'drill nights' at HMS Forward, which usually consist of 1.5 hours of lectures followed by an evening of getting pissed out in Birmingham.

Being a Royal Naval Reserve base, there is no shortage of instances of pisstaking at the expense of other services. I found a flyer being distributed there that I thought was particularly funny. Even though it is a little late, I thought I'd share this gem with my clanmates. :)

WE'RE LOOKING FOR BLOKES WHO WANT TO SPEND 9 MONTHS A YEAR AWAY FROM HOME ON CRAP PAY THEN PROVIDE STRIKE COVER FOR TOSSERS WHO ONLY WORK 6 MONTHS A YEAR FOR BETTER MONEY!!

You have to feel sorry for the firefighters. Two day shifts followed by two night shifts and then having to endure four days off!! Bless them. And for having to work this hard for effectively 6 months of the year they only get a miserable £17,000 basic wage + whatever they get from their second incomes.

Because of these appalling working conditions, only around 50 people apply for every vacancy the fire service have. So if you don't fancy competing with 49 other people for this kind of slave labour, why not join the Army and compete with yourself for 1 of the 50 posts available to you and all of that for even less than the firefighters basic wage. BARGAIN!

Sign below if you want to work for 12 months of the year, have you personal liberties removed from you for anywhere up to 6 months at a time and train for the possibility of dying for a country full of greedy, selfish pathetic individuals who cannot see past the end of their narrow minds (or fire engines).

Just to recap, if you want to work for crap money in all the god-forsaken shitholes of the world, or provide strike cover, with no recognition, then apply to: The Army, Political Arse House, Seen Off Street, London FuCK, FBU.

Name: _________________ Preferred Shitholes: _______________ Preferred area for strike cover: ________________

Army. Be Depressed.

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