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Friday 21 March 2003

The Bunny and the Snake [lurks]

Once upon a time in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit. “Oh, my,” said the bunny, “I'm terribly sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I've been blind since birth, so, I can't see where I'm going. In fact, since I'm also an orphan, I don't even know what I am.”
“It's quite OK,” replied the snake. “Actually, my story is much the same as yours. I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and work out what you are, so at least you'll have that going for you.” “Oh, that would be wonderful” replied the bunny.
So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, “Well, you're covered with soft fur; you have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have a soft cottony tail. I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit.”
“Oh, thank you! Thank you,” cried the bunny, in obvious excitement. The bunny suggested to the snake, “Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me.” So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, “Well, you're smooth slimy and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone and no balls. I'd say you are definitely French”.


  1. 'You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, France is accusing the US of arrogance andGermany doesn't want to go to war.'

  2. I'm putting in bulk order, who wants some?

  3. My communist ass is getting tired of all this France bashing. In the Great War France lost three times as many men as the US since the constitution was written. Perhaps France just understand how bad war is, and the US perhaps needs to do some learning?

  4. Gawd, here we go. Your 'communist ass' is again being staggeringly naive. Every bastard and dog knows the French's motivations have absolutely nothing to do with their not wanting to see any death. It has absolutely everything to do with their not wanting to see further American interests in the Middle east and of course their multi-billion deals with Saddam's regime in weapon-sales debts and oil contracts.

  5. Yep, it's been perfectly clear all along what the motives of the French are here.
    That said, it doesn't change the fact that however base the reasons behind it may be, I still think their stance is /right/... You know there's something wrong with the world when the politicians most accurately representing your views are Robin Cook and Jacques fucking Chirac...

  6. As I've said, I respect people who have a no-war view. I think there's a powerful case for it. It's not really one that I agree because I think that the opportunity should be used to remove Saddam at the end of the day.
    In fairness, there are a good deal of countries that oppose the action for the right reasons. It's just not France. In the context of this blog and the wider anti-French feeling, France running around claiming the moral high ground in these times is really a bit too much to stomach.
    And to be frank, I'd chuck Charles Kennedy in the same boat with France the way he's behaved.

  7. The French have money to motivate them... similar to the US trying prop up the ailing dollar.

  8. Q: Whats the Difference between the French and a piece of toast?

    A:You can make soldiers out of toast

    If the objective was to boost the dollar, then there most certainly wouldn't have been months and months of economy destroying uncertainty about war, they'd have dived in from the start to avoid that slippage.

  9. They couldn't dive in and maintain the facade about the weapons resolutions - it had to be timed correctly to avoid international condemnation on a much bigger scale.
    If the Americans had gone in on November 7th (Day after Saddam started trading his oil in Euros) do you think the UK and Spain would have gone? Do you think the reaction from the international community would have been so indifferent.

  10. Actually it's because in 1998 Iraq recovered a UFO. The USA wants the UFO badly so they can spirit it back to area 51. No one in the US government knows this, there's a conspiracy in the CIA which has high level operatives at every level of US and UK government. This secret branch of disgruntled CIA operatives is head up by the corporate CEO of McDonalds.
    This evil henchman is conducting a secret deal with planetary invaders which are trying to get around the benevelant 'silver big eyed' aliens' blockade of the planet earth. In return they will provide a secret recipe of addictive burger additivies which will be undetectable by human technology but invoke mind-control properties on the entire human race.This will make people more easily persuaded to pay more money for a Big Mac which in turn will make the evil boss of McDonalds more money so he gets so rich he will be able to buy Microsoft and embed subliminal instructions to abuse children sexually.

  11. EED - 'Can't debate, won't debate'

  12. Err, we debate fine. Were you not tied up in your simplistic leftist conspiracy theories, then you might have realised that by just taking a look at the other blog. By and large, I think most of the lads (pro or anti-war) put up a far more of a well thought-out argument than you ever have.