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Tuesday 18 January 2005

The Authoriteh [Am]

To clear up some misunderstandings, I'd like to draw to your attention that as I work for an investment bank that in fact I have subdjugated my entire fucking personality to it.
It's only fair that you should be aware of what this entails. In taking a non-existant oath to serving a money institution I have engaged in a neverending undertaking to uphold and publicise some middle class vaguely centric point of view about anything whatsoever including but especially over anything which conflicts with my personal points of view. Whenever I have a deeply held personal point of view this will be squashed because of where I work. As long as you judge me in accordance with where I work rather than my own views, this will be fair.
In particular, I'd like to highlight that I *do* think that I'm better than you and that whenever you express some point of view into an argument, my silence is not respect for your insight but purely time spent thinking about how I can get back at you. Just because you have a view doesn't mean that it isn't something I can't ridicule due to my nazi-financialism.
I look forward to engaging with you throughout the year on a number of issues on which I feel a deep personal conviction but which I then thoroughly bury and refute due to my job. It should be obvious that I cannot possibly have a personal conviction because of the place I earn my wages. I'm sure all the other members of the crosshatch enjoy the same experience.


  1. I refer the honorable gentleman to the first question on the Electric Death application form.

  2. I haven't huffed off out of the channel for aaaages. I only did it because I was letting the side down in not fulfilling my quota of huff. Peer pressure made me do it.