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Tuesday 4 February 2003

Movie roundup [lurks]

Right, I've been watching a few movies recently. Some of these are biggiest, some are less common. Here's my quick and dirty two line reviews;
  • Unfaithful: Not just yet another infidelity type movie, it's told from the point of view of a housewife having an affair. Gripping. 4/5
  • Punch Drunk Love: Weird 'art' film with Adam Sandler. Plot is yank standard that love heals weirdos. Boring and implausible. 2/5
  • Confessions of a Dangerous Mind: Based on the true story of TV producer Chuck Barris. He claims he was a CIA hitman, not true but makes it passable. 3/5
  • Catch Me if You Can: A hyped but enjoyable romp covering a career conman and the FBI agent that catches him. Good fun. 4/5
  • Gangs of New York: Despite DiCaprio and dodgy Irish accents, this Scorsese flick hits the mark. Violent but relevant, superb. 5/5
  • Red Dragon: Prequel to Silence of the Lambs, this remake of 'Manhunter' is nothing new but Hopkins and Norton are excellent. 4/5
  • Bowling for Columbine: Michael Moore explores American gun violence in this feature documentary. Disturbing, revealing, required viewing. 5/5
You slack wankers are welcome to add more. Whack a list marker in front of them to make them easy to read. I've got a few more movies queued up so I'll add to this later in the week.


  1. Vanilla Sky: Tom cruise in a ripoff of 'Silicon Man'. OK Though. 3/3

  2. Star Trek: Nemesis: Lacklustre predict-o-yarn remake of Wrath of Khan that fails to impress. 3/5

  3. 8 Mile: Eminem plays young white rapper. No surprise there then. Still an ok movie tho. 3/5Sweet Home Alabama: Standard highschool sweethearts reunited after x years story. One for the missus. 2/5James Bond: Die Another Day: A decent 007 movie at last! The last couple of efforts have been so-so (Timothy Dalton anyone?), but this is a 007 flick as it should be! 5/540 Days and 40 Nights: Guy wows not to have sex in 40 days, and suddenly every woman on earth wants to shag him (including his ex). Has Josh Hartnett in it so the missus will like it. 3/5The Accidental Spy: Jackie Chan in a Hong-Kong action movie. Lots of the usual J. Chan fighting scenes, nothing new but still ok if you like Jackie Chan movies. 3/5

  4. - your ultimate movie resource.

  5. Err, yes I think you'll find we all know about IMDB.

  6. Not sure if we're meant to be adding our own thoughts on stuff already mentioned, but hey... Star Trek Nemesis: Kill this franchise, please. Disappointingly average special effects can't cover up a pathetically weak script, and Stewart and Hardy are wasted on woefully badly written roles while the rest of the wooden cast aren't even good actors to begin with. Didn't make me lose the will to live like Insurrection did, though. 2/5. Bowling for Columbine: It's not entirely balanced, but it's one of the most insightful investigations of American society I've ever seen. It should be required viewing for everyone, with the caveat that you should still look further and make up your own mind. 5/5. Spirited Away: Hayao Miyazaki's latest film, and once again he claimed his last - although he's apparently working on another one now. As ever, it's magical, dark and entertaining, like a Brothers Grimm fairytale with none of the corners knocked off; superb, unpatronising and imaginative 'family' movie that most Daily Mail readers would disapprove of - a ringing endorsement! 5/5 Donnie Darko: It's not the best film ever, and those claiming it is are getting tedious now; but it's a thoughtful and entertaining film regardless. Perhaps trying a little TOO hard to be 'not Hollywood' sometimes, though... 4/5 Dog Soldiers: Out to rent now on DVD, and definitely a classic in the 'post-pub beer and pizza movie' genre. Inconsistent direction and occasionally rubbish special effects are made up for by sparkling British dialogue, making this the film most likely to confuse the fuck out of Americans since Trainspotting. 4/5 The Two Towers: Look, I just didn't like it as much as everyone else. It's epic, it's stunning, Gollum is amazing, but it's too bloody long, its badly edited and its woefully paced. And the Ents are crap. Still not a bad film, but flawed in a lot of ways that Fellowship wasn't, and the contrast makes it all the more notable. 3/5

  7. 51st State - Suprisingly entertaining Brit crime comedy with Sam 'The Man' Jackson. 3/5

  8. Ghost Ship: Low budget, by-the-numbers horror film with no plot and no scares. Absolute rubbish, one really wonders why they're advertising this. 1/5The Foreigner: Take a Steven Seagal movie, introduce a confusing plot full of holes and add b-movie action scenes. Utter garbage. 1/5


  9. City of God: GO AND SEE THIS FILM! NOW! You forget its not in Englishafter about 2 seconds. Very close to being just as good as goodfellas.

    8 Mile: Very good, well worth seeing. It does not make him an actor, Idon't think we will see him opposite Meg Ryan in a romantic comedy, butit's a good flick. 4/5

    Star Trek: Utter Pish (as they say in Scotland) -1,000,000/5

    Gangs of New York - Best movie I have seen since the first LoTR movie.I can get over the dodgy accents (not as bad as Tom Cruise in far andaway for example), and miscasting of DiCaprio. The best actor currentlyworking, Day Lewis, is back and proves again he's the man! 5/5

    Shinji: Yes the ents were total crap, but I think you are being harsh onTTT. It's a classic, you cant get past the fact it's a great story!

  10. Evolver: It Was Supposed to be a Game!!!!! Classic Sci-Fi movie, If youhaven't seen it rent it NOW!!! Its beyond words and belief 5/5

  11. Heh Spiro, I wondered when you were going to get around to watching that :) As for the comments on LOTR TTT, I also thought it was disappointing. It was fun and epic in scale but I felt it was all done before with the first movie - so the onus was off the spectactle and that allowed the shit acting and editing to harm it for me.

  12. I actually watched it the day after I received it. But its taken this longfor it to sink in, the plot, the effects, I mean WOW!!! its unreal.

  13. Vanilla Sky: Impressive effort from Cruise. It's marred by an inappropriate soundtrack and being too long but otherwise very good. 4/5

  14. The Pianist: A Brilliant Film, really is Polanski at his best. Story ofa middle class Jewish pianist in Warsaw during World War 2. I'm a bitof a WW2 buff, so while not totally accurate, its very close to thetruth. I have never seen the whole audience sit through all of thecredits of a movie before!

  15. 'The Foreigner' starring Steven Seagal and a bunch of poncy nobodies with the worst affected accents ever committed to film.This really is absolutely dreadful; and not really worth even so much as a 1/5 - unfortunately, some of the 'oooh I've ripped off John Woo' shit is actually quite watchable, so it climbs on the scale.Don't even TALK about the 'ending'.. fucking hell. BACK TO FILM SCHOOL THE LOT OF YOU!Sweet Home Alabama: a wishy washy romantic comedy type thing playing on the common stereotypical differences between urbanite New Yorkers and 'dumb' Southerners. Predictable, watchable, probably better to have a wank, but this wins if your folks are round. 3/5