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Thursday 23 October 2003

London Underground - SACK SACK SACK [brit]

This is a major rant. You are hereby warned.
London Underground. Criminals. Charlatans. Liars. Incompetents. Tossers.
3 major incidents have happened in the last month, including 2 derailments - unless you live and work in central london and use the tube daily, you cannot imagine what it's like; the city becomes paralysed, other forms of transport can't cope, and things grind to a halt.
I for one am sick to death of it, and it only gets worse when I talk to a mate of mine who is a driver on the Circle Line; it appears that aside from the tube drivers and station staff, every other mother fucking wanker who works there is a workshy lazy non committed arsehole.
A case in point; the latest problem on the Victoria line. The train stopped, and it took NINETY minutes to evacuate the nearly 3,000 people trapped in and around the area affected. NINETY! - what sort of fucking asshole takes NINETY minutes to sort out a situation such as that?
Another one; the Hammersmith 'incident' - it is a well known fact that to all intents and purposes, the Circle line doesn't exist, it's a mash of Hammersmith & Metropolitan, and District lines. It's therefore controlled from 2 control offices (line controllers these morons are called) who on a frequent basis do not answer emergency calls via radio link, and who tend to ignore calls from Circle line drivers as they are deemed - in some twisted fucked up way - as the poor relation. Circle line drivers regularly have to pretend to be a H&M or D train in order to get a line controller to sort shit out.
The underground is I'm sure not short of cash. It is however utterly, UTTERLY awash with fucking pricks who have NO fucking clue or notion or desire when it comes to doing their job properly, professionally, and safely. Is there a way out? YES, I think so - I want every last drop of management, and support/maintenance staff SACKED. I want them replaced with an American management team, because lets face it, they don't have this problem and they know how to run a business.
Fucking sort it. Wankers.


  1. But hey! The Government is sorting this out for us already! They're handing over the running of the tube to private companies whose primary goal is achieving shareholder value - which, as the privatisation of our railways, hospitals etc has proved, always leads to the provision of more efficient and useful services!

  2. I live in Manchester. We don't have an underground. The place is lovely though, and almost zero transport problems. The city builds roads long in advance of requirement, and when something crops up like, for example, the glutton of traffic around the SW portion of the ring road due to the Trafford Centre and the recent explosion of businesses in that area, they start building extra lanes on the motorways pronto.
    Oh, did I mention we've got a modern, clean and quiet tramway system? And that they're extending it primarily into areas of the city that most require urban regeneration?
    Must suck to live in a city that is run badly. So why live there? It's not like you need to get an immigration certificate to move elsewhere (though I'm sure that will trigger a northandertal joke).

  3. Nice attempt at derailing the blog Afty. People live in London because it is the heart of the industry of this country. The reason your Manchester doesn't have these problems is because no fucker lives there for fuck sake.
    Conversely if no one wanted to live in London, because their work was in London as was everyone they know, then these problem wouldn't be as big.
    It's always horses for courses. Living up North has it's advantages, no doubt. Transport may be one of them, at least if you're of the belief (as most people are who live awa from urban centres) that the way forward for the human race is that every man woman and child owns their own internal combustion engine and stokes it with fossil fuels daily.
    London was never designed for this burden of humany and the transportation problems. It's just having to try and deal with problems which require a huge industry just to serve the process of moving people about. Unfortunately because of the historic way the UK has operated state-run institutions without any form of formal accountability structure running through it, it's as useless and inefficient as every other governmental department. Just like your hospitals are up North. (Except that all the proper doctors are in the famous London hospitals of course).

  4. Click the London Underground song on this page: had the wonderful line "They're all lazy fucking useless cunts" :-)